Thursday, September 18, 2008

Chicken 2008



The GOP's despicable campaign tactics - their repetition of patent falsehoods and pandering to the lowest common denominator - are not worthy of even feigned respect. They have 'succeeded' in the past two Presidential cycles because they make arguments that so defy logic that they cannot be reasonably debated. They launch character attacks that so shock the conscience that scores of people believe them to be fact. They have made dubious slander into an art form and democratic subjugation a science. 

Every 4 years, the GOP challenges the DNC to a game of chicken. And every 4 years, we swerve. 
This year, let's have some faith in the steel of our resolve, in the sturdiness of our arguments, and in the safety of the truth. This year, let's embrace our historic responsibility. Let us grit our teeth, put the pedal to the metal, and turn their sorry asses into an electoral hood ornament.

"Senator McCain, this is Cheryl from OnStar*. We see that your driver's-side douchebag has been deployed..."

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

FED + AIG = OMFG

One can't help but utter expletives when abbreviations start absorbing acronyms (eg: The Fed & AIG). Three-lettered cannibalism spells TROUBLE for the USA. 


DEAR GOP:

We hope that you've enjoyed wiping the BS off of your lips with our 401k's for the past 8 years.

IOU a big F.U.

with hate,

- The American Public

Monday, September 15, 2008

"Whiskey Vote"

Every four years, America gets wicked drunk and makes some bad decisions. And you've gotten away with it -- no one can tag you in the embarrassing photographic evidence on Facebook. But admit it, you're still haunted by the memories.... GOOD. You should be ashamed.

This November, you have an opportunity to redeem yourself. This year, you have a chance to take the walk of shame out of the polling place and put it back where it belongs... your weekends.

So listen up America! On November 4th, lay off the sauce and go to the polls WITHOUT your "Beer Goggles." 

Have some respect for yourselves. Drink some coffee, Wake Up and Vote sober. 
Vote Obama / Biden.

That's Obama / Biden 2008:
No hangovers.
No regrets.
No herpes. We swear.



Sincerely,
America's Young People

(Andrew F.)

Copyright © 2008. All Rights Reserved.

ALSO FROM AMERICA'S YOUNG PEOPLE:

AP to AK: "What's goin on in alaskahh?"

'Hey, there's no news anywhere else. 
What's goin on in Alaska? Nothing? 
ok we'll check-in again in a few years.'

Sarah Palin Sees Sasquatch! -- Who Knew Bigfoot was a Born-Again?!